DREAMER

Paul Millard Dreamer

A Shelter From The Storm

We see the world in a sadness
like no one else can see
blinded by four walls,
you see only the dream

A shelter from the storm
you find in love or a song
trying hard to be right
but you see us as wrong

Lonely is the night
you’ve nothing that compairs
living on the streets
a life full of dispair

The clouds form shapes
of Angels at play
they come for us at night
and take us away

Perhaps born too late
as we die so young
laid to rest in a grave
no marker to sing our song

we have stories to tell
but no one to hear
history is lost
whenever we disappear

Copyright ©2005 Paul Millard

A Hobo’s Cry

My heart feels like breaking
My soul wants to die
She turns her head
Whenever she walks by

To her all I am
Is a homeless man
No one of value
Not in her plan

There is so much of me
Wanting to come out
I’m tired of hiding
In a life of doubt

But alas all I can do
Is to sit here and sigh
Because no one can hear
A Hobo’s cry.

Copyright ©2005 Paul Millard

Death Came In The Form Of Strangers
(An Ode To Maria Catherine King)

“Death came in the form of strangers”
on a cold dark Berkeley night
the streets became a victim to
things that go bump and cause fright.

Maria was no stranger to streets
but a friend to all who lived there
A smile on her face, a dream in her heart
and Big Mac’s with friends she would share

She was a free spirt not one to be tamed
but desperately in need of some care
prophetically she said that she would be dead
before her fiftieth birthday affaire

Her candle was snuffed as she sought shelter in stuff
behind a second had clothing store
two boys in hoods over her stood
and kicked her till she was no more

The world is a lesser place without the face
of a street angel named Maria King
our hearts are downcast, her memory steadfast
a life is a beautiful thing.

Copyright ©2005 Paul Millard

Things Made Of Sand

The sun broke free from the clouds today,
and love came under fire,
I don’t know what I thought you’d say,
when I spoke of my desires.

I guess I blamed you for rejecting me,
When I know it was my own fault.
I thought I was as special as you were to me
so I let my heart out of the vault.

You can’t always get what you want,
so I have been warned,
Don’t build your life on things made of sand,
they will not weather the storm.

A Cry In The Wind

Last night there was a cry in the wind,
the Angel of Death, took one of us home,
Lying in a lean-to made of cardboard and gin,
our brother was dry, but the wind too cold.

A family of four huddles in a tent,
papa lost his job to Mexico,
He tries his best, but the money is spent,
only job he could find was at burgers to go.

Stub lost his leg in the Vietnam war,
his wheel chair is how he moves,
A local group paid for batteries galore,
but could not find him a room.

Try as we may, try as we might,
to understand why too few care,
Every one knows apathy’s not right,
yet hear not the cries of despair.

Copyright ©2005 Paul Millard

An ode to Michelle

There’s a lot of space to get lost in,
well I’m lost in my own now,
The day after tomorrow happens today,
so it really is time to have a cow.

A sweet soul died in the cold,
while sleeping in the park,
she was turned away from shelter,
by people with cold hearts.

If I only had known she was alone,
we could have huddled together,
there was no need for a human being,
to succumb out in the weather.

An ode to Michelle is all I can do,
to late to do anything else,
The tears I shed now are for her,
and not wasted on myself.

© 2004 Paul Millard

Her Trail Of Tears
(Ode To Reta Reingruber)

I awoke this morning not feeling my toes,
thought I turned a corner and ran into myself
sleeping on the streets is much too cold,
all I needed was a little bit of help.

Growing older isn’t supposed to be so tough,
should be surrounded by things of comfort
things of comfort now unevenly rough
total lack of compassion from courts

Five months Reta set in a morgue,
too poor to be buried with honor
her trail of tears has been forged,
needing only a granite tower

They’ve forgotten the olive branch,
that once was extended in peace,
we’re not looking for riches of chance,
we just want a little piece.

Copyright ©2005 Paul Millard

No Love Left To Find

We’re out here, we’re cold, society’s embarrassment ,
no room at the inn, a warm sip of gin, or a slice of bread.
The begotten, forgotten alone on the street,
hurt and scared, and now left for dead.

Tired to the bone, no place to call home,
life’s witnesses with no life I suppose.
No trim for a tree, or chamomile tea,
no normal pleasures, a hidden rose.

They make their attack upon Iraq,
and leave our world behind.
discarded, forever downhearted,
with no love left to find.

© 2004 Paul Millard

Rainbows In The Dark

Our voices are lost to a broken world,
they’re just echoes, too indiscriminate to be heard
Laughter as cold as the frozen rain,
our existence, just adds to their disdain .

Can’t you see we’re not free,
we’re just rainbows in the dark

Timeless as ghost ship out to sea,
trusted silence, now screams to you and me.
Bold intentions, are what keep us holding on,
without our will, soon we would be gone.

Can’t you see we’re not free
we’re just rainbows in the dark

Homeless we are poor we are alone
searching for a place to call our home
Hidden yet standing in plain view
robbed,beatened,hated for not being like you

Can’t you see we’re not free
we’re just rainbows in the dark

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

Things Made Of Sand

The sun broke free from the clouds today,
and love came under fire,
I don’t know what I thought you’d say,
when I spoke of my desires.

I guess I blamed you for rejecting me,
When I know it was my own fault.
I thought I was as special as you were to me
so I let my heart out of the vault.

You can’t always get what you want,
so I have been warned,
Don’t build your life on things made of sand,
they will not weather the storm.

A Cry In The Wind

Last night there was a cry in the wind,
the Angel of Death, took one of us home,
Lying in a lean-to made of cardboard and gin,
our brother was dry, but the wind too cold.

A family of four huddles in a tent,
poppa lost his job to Mexico,
He tries his best, but the money is spent,
only job he could find was at burgers to go.

Stub lost his leg in the Vietnam war,
his wheel chair is how he moves,
A local group paid for batteries galore,
but could not find him a room.

Try as we may, try as we might,
to understand why too few care,
Every one knows apathy’s not right,
yet hear not the cries out here.

Copyright ©2005 Paul Millard

An ode to Michelle

There’s a lot of space to get lost in,
well I’m lost in my own now,
The day after tomorrow happens today,
so it really is time to have a cow.

A sweet soul died in the cold,
while sleeping in the park,
she was turned away from shelter,
by people with cold hearts.

If I only had known she was alone,
we could have huddled together,
there was no need for a human being,
to succumb out in the weather.

An ode to Michelle is all I can do,
to late to do anything else,
The tears I shed now are for her,
and not wasted on myself.

© 2004 Paul Millard

Her Trail Of Tears

(Ode To Reta Reingruber)
I awoke this morning not feeling my toes,
thought I turned a corner and ran into myself
sleeping on the streets is much too cold,
al I needed was a little bit of help.

Growing older isn’t supposed to be so tough,
should be surrounded by things of comfort
things of comfort now unevenly rough
total lack of compassion from courts

Five months Reta set in a morgue,
too poor to be buried with honor
her trail of tears has been forged,
needing only a granite tower

They’ve forgotten the olive branch,
that once was extended in peace,
we’re not looking for riches of chance,
we just want a little piece.

Copyright ©2005 Paul Millard

What Purpose Do I Have?

Why is it I feel,
that if I cover my eyes,
no one else can see me?

The world seems to me
to be all too much,
just a little too dreamy

I think of you often and
your not needing me,
tears me in half

If you can’t touch me,
then what purpose
do I have?

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

Life’s Not Fair

There are shadows in the night, hidden out of sight,
they come out when you close your eyes
they’re taller than your soul, connected to your toes,
and make your nightmares come alive.

Whispers in your ear, things that cause you fear,
makes you feel insane.
But only in dreams, I fit in it seems
I awake and everything remains the same.

These things they do, are making me blue,
chilling me to the bone,
it’s hard to be ill, such a jagged little pill,
I’ve never felt so all alone.

Cast out upon the streets, ragged shoes on my feet,
I watch as people walk by.
shiny happy people, under a church steeple,
say prayers for me, while others watch me die.

© 2005 Paul Millard

My Love Is True

The first time I held you in my arms,
it felt like you were mine
I’m seeing you in a different light,
Ere now I was blind.

And when I looked into your eyes
you captured my soul
And where that may lead me now
only time will show.

For you know I love you,
and my love is true
I’ll place you up above me
and let your light shine through.

I’ll give you all I have to give
I’ll give you even more.
I’d lay down my life for you,
that’s what love is for.

If I’ve ever let you down,
or caused you any pain.
I hope you will forgive me,
and love me once again.

For you know I love you,
and my love is true
I’ll place you up above me
and let your light shine through.

I never said just how I felt,
I kept it all inside
But now that I am open,
I’ve nothing left to hide.

It’s said faith can move mountains,
But your love has melt my heart,
No matter what you do or say
your love from me won’t part.

For you know I love you,
and my love is true
I’ll place you up above me
and let your light shine through.

There are times you’ve spoken to my heart
in ways which can’t be heard.
Your eyes said just how you felt,
without saying a word.

I know that with you in my arms,
I truly have been blessed
Your love has made me whole again,
God’s given me the best.

For you know I love you,
and my love is true
I’ll place you up above me
and let your light shine through.

And I know you love me,
that’s all I need to know.
My thoughts of you will keep me warm,
till it is my time to go.

Copyright ©2000 Paul Millard

Jimmy White Eagle

Left lying face down in Red Deer Table
a canyon of of ashes and hate,
He knew too much, told too many
to now escape that fate.

Should have shape shifted,
and flown away,
should have, if he would have
Jimmy White Eagle would be here today.

Proud as the Buffalo he stood ground,
full Oglala Sioux raised on the Res.
He fought the pro government natives
who would sell tradition for pez

Yellow Hawk shot him
5 times in the back
with an M-16 you see
he was government backed

Jimmy knew they were drilling
for Uranium and ruining the land
He wanted to bring back the Buffalo
so it was time to make a stand.

Jimmy White Eagle died a warier
and proud to die that way,
the last thing he said as the bullets flew
was Hoka Hey grand father Hoka Hey.

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

Once I Had My Mind

Once I had my mind, and my mind was my own,
Once I had a life, and to everyone I did owe
Once I had a dream, but it was someone else’s lie
Once I wanted to live, but now I wish to die

I was brought into this world, through no fault of my own
I was brought into this world, and left unto my own
I was born into this life, and this is a gift??
I was born to die, into a coma I must drift..

I am tired of this pain, running through my bones
I am tired of these people, why won’t they leave me alone
I am tired of the hate for people just like me
I am tired of the hate and it just now angers me!!

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

Time Won’t Forget

You were my treasure, a gift love brought to me
your sunny smiling face tattooed hope onto my heart
I don’t know what I brought to you, what you saw in me,
I had hoped it would be enough love that we would never part.

I layed and watched you sleep like an angel of dreams,
a magical glow surrounded you like a dream come true
the best time I ever had in my sad pathetic life,
were the times i spent with you.

God your smile lit up my heart like the 4th of July,
your eyes sparkled with joy turning blue for me to see,
I know it was love I saw, what I felt for you,
Time won’t forget what you meant to me….

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

When I Look At You

When I look at you,
I see anger, I see pain.
where dose it come from,
what does it gain?

You look familiar to me,
how is it I know you?
A likeness in the eyes,
and the things you do.

what is it you think?
are your thoughts as deep?
is this a reflection?
is this me?

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

The Universe

Feeling tired and old, I put on my glasses
but they slipped down my nose!
I stare out the port window watch the stars go by,
a young man’s game, this gallivanting across the cosmos.

The universe larger than any mythical god, and I larger
than a quark, yet compared to the stars, just as small.
and as meaningless as a dark whole or nebula perdition,
I exist a small blue thing looking for my all in all.

Like Diogenes I walked the streets looking for an honest man.
which I never found, the truth lost in today’s sharp Lawyering,
bartering, shuck and jawing, hem-hawing..we no longer seek
it, find it, nor live it..we reinvent it,and sleep on it till morning.

So my escape I made to the Universe, disassociating myself
from Earth, from birth, from polysorbate 80, from me.
all my beginning goes back to a sperm and an egg, a meeting
of the minds so to speak, which could have been stopped by a sneeze.

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

I Had A Dream

I had a dream,
but it did not last.
Once again my future,
is now my past.

When will I learn, not
to listen to my heart?
For it is dumb!
Not very smart!

My head knows,
I am no prize!
nothing special
in anyones eyes!

Empty inside now,
nothing is left.
My incept date,
began my death.

All I had,
that I had, was hope!
All that is gone,
and gone won’t float!

The thread, that was my thread,
was not tightly wound.
And when that thread, unthread
all hit the ground.

I had a dream,
I watched it die,
and so it did and it did,
so shall I……
(Sweet dreams are made of these, who am I to disagree?)

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

A Shadow Upon My Soul

I moan from within this pain of my skin
As I rock my self into my shell
I pretend that I’m fine, when all of the time
I’m actually going through hell.

Tear filled eyes of the dreams that have died
There’s a shadow upon my soul,
How I long to be free from what’s killing me
so my mind can be once again whole.

Colors in my head make me feel I’m dead,
when I’m actually just asleep,
everything seems real tell me what’s the deal
Am I in this way too deep.

I refuse to awake to this life I’ve escaped
Why you bother I just don’t know.
Now they lock me up, with my empty cup,
and I reep the life you have sown.

I’m screaming inside from the pain I hide,
Benith the carnival face I have on.
I pray to above, for a Teddy Bear hug,
for that will make the pain be gone..

Copyright ©2002 Paul Millard

A Lonely Poet
( An Ode To Sara Teasdale )

Just another poet,
to die in a lonely place.
And yet this lonely poet,
was able to wear her own face!

While lost to others,
she believed in words of love.
And the love of words was in her heart
which came from God above!

Sara, whate made you take your life,
so suddenly that day?
How many more words of love and life,
are gone, now you have gone away?

Like just another poet,
I write my words into the dust
and hope someday they will reach someone
and in them I will have trust.

For Sara you will be in my heart
and your words upon my soul,
In hopes to inspire a new me
for that which is my goal!

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

Restless was the wind
( Ode to Natalie Wood )

Restless was the wind that flowed through her hair,
My mind captured her essence, her style her flair.
The sun and moon light, how the glistened in her eyes,
Added a magical, mystical glow which took me by suprise!

She was such a beauty on the west side, way beyond compare,
Yet it was through Brainstorm that she really took me there!
The look of love was in her eyes as she stood opposite of him,
A handsome man so debonair,would have to take it on the chin.

Oh the pain I felt,when she died that long dark night.
And took with her a piece of my heart,
which has never since been right
Died to young, her flame blew out,yet her spirit still remains

Paul Millard

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

The Untold Tale

My mind drifts like a cloud,
above time, into space,
yet tethered to my shoulders
seems unreal, no sense of touch,
feeling none the bolder.

No line of time, no time to die,
days of future past,then, now or ago.
No lime for the coconut,the remedy is lost,
did you not know?

Words are a mystery,Mystery in my words,
The untold tale
The truth isn’t strait,strait to the truth,
Forked tongue, pointed tail.

Dance until dawn,dawn of the dance
beginning to end
Is love real? Real is my love!
Of that I do not pretend.

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

Scented Like A Rose

I write of my blues,
is that so hard to understand?
And the loneliness of my heart,
has gotton so far out of hand.

I get the urge for going,
when a new moon has arose.
On a trip to wonder land,
Scented like a rose.

With my eyes closed,
I can feel my shadow sway,
and listen as the fowl fly,
to a new home on the bay.

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

The Cat In The Hat

Riddle me this, Riddle me that,
Take it from The Cat In The Hat.
Find me a way, Make it today,
Do it before I’m led astray.
Shiver me timbers, timber my house
I am living, I’m a mouse.

What is real? What’s the Deal?
Now you’ve gone and made me steal.
Like my Rhymes, Rhymes no crime,
Tell me that you will be mine.

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

The Lone Gunman

The truth is always best hidden
between two lies
You’ll never find it,
no matter how hard you try

It’s a lonely job I had,
only a loner could have,
it sad and it’s lonely,
and being lonely is sad.

I took my shot from grassy knoll,
in a police man’s uniform.
trying to right a wrong,
it’s to hard for me to conform

when it was done, I moved on
your government paid me well,
Yeah I am a Lone Gunman,
The Lone Gunman can’t you tell?

I lit up a Morley, and took a puff,
standing on that roof top,
He sat on that balcony, enemy of CIA,
he sat in cross hairs and then a pop.

When it was done, I moved on
your government paid me well,
Yeah I am a Lone Gunman,
The Lone Gunman can’t you tell?

I stood in an L.A. crowd, once again
a Morley in my mouth,
I didn’t want to do it this time,
but it was too late to back out.

I loved him, he was a man
ahead of his time,
running against Nixon,
was his only crime.

When it was done, I moved on
your government paid me well,
Yeah I am a Lone Gunman,
The Lone Gunman can’t you tell?

He sang his song of revolution,
discontent of Chairman Mao,
oh love is all we need and
it’s all we need right now.

Give peace a chance,
Imagine peace in our time,
but it’s not what “they” wanted
peace was a crime.

When it was done, I moved on
your government paid me well,
Yeah I am a Lone Gunman,
The Lone Gunman can’t you tell?

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

It’s Coming

I feel the vibration, it’s coming,
it’s been coming since I was born,
I never knew, how could I have known
my life would be so torn?

How can a loser be lost,
when there’s nothing left to lose?
How can a life be considered a loss,
when it’s not the life for you?

The steel is so cold,
as I lay my head upon it,
Vision flash through my mind
of roses and gin tonic

I close my eyes and
pretend that I’m not here,
it’s getting more difficult
as the engine draws near.

I can do this, I know I can,
it is my final way out,
I can do this, “I think I can”
the smoke chugging out it’s spout.

It is here now just feet away,
there’s no turning back?
well at least that’s what I thought
until I rolled off the track.

Why?, Why, did I choose not to die ?
When?, When? much to my chagrin !
How?, How I need to know now !
Where?, Where will I find Thee one who cares?

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

Words In My Head

Sort of feeling like a blind man
walking through life white cane in hand
living a life of illusion,
only adds to the confusion

Trying hard to define me,
trying hard to remind me
that I’m still a man

I’m sorry!, I’m sorry !
this isn’t a bed time story !
There’s these words in my head
and they keep telling me
Yeah, Go! Go! Go!, No no
Go! Go! Go!, No no

Tired of feeling emasculated,
all of this leaves me feeling jaded
don’t think I can take much more this,
feel I’m falling into an abyss

Trying hard to define me,
trying hard to remind me
that I’m still a man

I’m sorry!, I’m sorry !
this isn’t a bed time story !
There’s these words in my head
and they keep telling me
Yeah, Go! Go! Go!, No no
Go! Go! Go!, No no

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

No Fate

” No fate, but what we make it”
Spoken from the future to the past,
leads one to believe we set our
own destiny in this life made of glass.

Emperor Marcus Aurelius in his
meditations we do find,
“Whatsoever befalls thee,it was ordained
unto thee from the beginning of time.”

What happens in a man’s life is already written,
he walks through life as destiny leads him to do,
and yet he is free to make choices that effects
his future, while both are opposite, both are true.

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

A Humbug

Christmas is a Humbug,
a Humbug indeed !
Christmas is a Humbug,
says he and me !

A time to be merry they
say with forked tongue,
A time to be merry?
how can they be so dumb?
Once a Christian holiday,
now a capitalist feast,
No longer about family,
money is the nature of the beast.

I want to run and hide from this,
I know you think that’s wrong
but I’m gonna run and hide
until Christmas is gone.

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

A Fix

All that I have isn’t really Mine,
They don’t even exist.
They are illusions to fill time and
space, to give my eyes a fix.

Mind over matter,
it’s a matter of time,
before I am missing,
and missing is fine.

No one can miss me
if I’m not really here,
you won’t remember my name,
this time next year.

Can’t I even be a twinkle
in those beautiful eyes?
won’t I ever mean something to
someone before I die?

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

Insane

Time after time I’ve looked into
my own reflection, detection, imperfection.
And every time you look you seem
to look right through me, you knew me, unglued me.
So I found myself alone, with my own pain
and with no were else to go, I went insane.

So now I live my life inside your own
findings, reminding, confining.
When I need you most you turn your
back upon me, it’s haunting, daunting me.
So I find myself alone, with my own pain,
and with no where else to go, I go insane.

I feel my mind has slipped into
a bad place, I lost face, my own space.
Time to stop the strong from victimizing
the weakened, off the deep end, I’ll defeat them.
and I’ll find myself alone, with my own pain,
now there was no where else to go, so I went insane.

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

Freedom Rider
(Paul Revere)

Destination trouble on a midnight run,
lanterns in the north church steeple, it had begun!
Dawes, Doc Sam and I in one accord,
made our run to warn the men of Concord

The British are coming, the British are coming!!
we howled along the way,
tell everyone you know, the battle for Independence,
has now begun today

April 18, 1775 the night I take my famous ride,
who knew the word I passed on along the way,
would lead us to sign a piece of paper,
declaring our Independence Day..

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

We Two

At night I dream a thousand dreams of you,
in shades of awesome splender.
Riding the clouds of a Unicorn sky,
and of the joyous time spent there.

Your skin’s silky smooth, I kiss your neck,
I feel your passion bloom like a rose,
and mine as you run fingers through my hair,
At this point anything goes.

The night has a thousand eyes,
all transfixed on you!
But I know not of them,
only of the love of We Two.

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

To Be Remembered

All of time has come,
seasons of time undone.
I cast my salt into the wind,
it returns to where it begins.

One and one makes three,
I lost all of my dreams.
Made my wish upon a Star,
alas I got not far

Juliet lost her way,
Romeo’s in decay.
Together now in eternity,
follow them with me.

One thing before I go,
these things I want you to know.
I only leave as I feel severed,
all I want is to be remembered…

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

The Untold Tale

My mind drifts like a cloud,
above time, into space,
yet tethered to my shoulders
The sounds all echo,
seems unreal, no sense of touch,
feeling none the bolder.

No line of time, no time to die,
days of future past,then, now or ago.
No lime for the coconut,the remedy is lost,
did you not know?

Words are a mystery,Mystery in my words,
The untold tale
The truth isn’t strait,strait to the truth,
Forked tongue, pointed tail.

Dance until dawn,dawn of the dance
beginning to end
Is love real? Real is my love!
I do not pretend

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

Searching For A Dream

I let the World pass
as I want no part of it,
and yet I cry because I am not.
I sit and I watch
as people go by
in the summer when it’s hot.

They know who they are
and what they are not
and live some where in between.
I know nothing of myself,
living dazed confused,
searching for a dream…

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

Like An Angel

Like an Angel lost in flight,
she hides behind a cloud
looking for her life and a love
to claim as hers aloud.

The clouds all twisted and dark,
makes it hard for her too see
nothing to her is real,
it all appears as a dream

Through blind twist of fate,
I found a place in her heart,
I grab hold of her heart strings
and promise never to part.

Think of me O’ warm dear one,
let me fill part of your life aband
look into my eyes and soul,
come now, take me by the hand.

Copyright ©2002 Paul Millard

Long Night

You don’t know where your shadow will fall.
the light ever changing, east, west, sun, and
moon, bright, soft or none at all.

My shadow’s taller than my soul.
when the sun sinks low, and my
sky’s aglow of orange like cantaloupe

My shadows are many, running here
walking there, chasing one in front, the
one behind stabbeths so beware

It’s the ones at night that cause me fright,
for no light makes them appear, they sleep not
nor do I, it’s going to be a long night

Copyright ©2002 Paul Millard

The Wind Is Sighing

I know that tonight the wind is sighing, as it
glides across your warm naked body in the sand,
where we let our flesh mingle into one soft gentle
shapely form, silhouetted by moon light cast against
the land.

I bathed myself in your purity, breathed in your
fragrant scent of a woman so full of life, love
and sweetness abound.
as I treasure these moments as though the were to be
our last,etching your glow into my mind, and fall
asleep beside you on the ground.

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

The Plight Of The Homeless Man

No more chasing rainbows,
that pot of gold is empty inside !
The thing dreams are made of,
doesn’t exist on either side.

A man sits alone and cold, wondering
from where his next meal will come?
We’re all two steps from homeless,
what has this world become?

Singing my song of blues,
for the plight of the homeless man,
Be careful of what you choose,
life is a careless plan.

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

Confused

You look into my eyes
but the doors are closed,
the light is already gone
there’s more you want I suppose

I look into your eyes,
but the love is gone,
you no longer want me
am I wrong?

I look into my dreams,
but your still there I see,
so why is my mind clouded?
is it all just me?

The noise in my head is deafening
the things my eyes see burn
I know you know these feelings
there’s more of you to learn.

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

When Did They Begin

When did they begin
listening but forgetting to hear?
why don’t they hear?

Why do they stare
undisturbed not seeing what’s there?
why cant they see?

I am blind to them
but can see what they cant,
lost in the presence of absolute absence.

you lift me up but I’m being pulled under
I cant find myself,
waves of anger overwhelming.

looking for myself, more intense than before
the image that i see, reflections of someone,
its not you i wish to be.

I could sit on a window sill, let the wind swallow me up,
There is nothing to dread,
I am not who i was, someone else is in my head…

Copyright ©2003 Paul Millard

Fetal Insecurity

All she wanted was to be loved,
a legacy passed onto me,
The closet dark and locked,
the footsteps just outside won’t see.

Hiding within a chifferobe,
to scared to make a sound,
in fetal insecurity,
till the bottle hit the ground.

Desperately seeking love,
I did not run away,
Alas there is no love for me,
I should not have stayed.

Every child born of love,
should have that love returned.
giving back to that given to you,
has rewards for you to earn.

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

My Colors

I want no one to see me or my colors,
even though the candle flickers in my eyes
there is so much of me I need to hide,
institutional green records the tears I cry.

Ares intertwined in a war with Eris,
though she drew first blood, he survived
Hera so beautiful captures my soul,
the flame flickers blue and extinguishes the lie.

Spreading my memory with a bite,
well known in the darkest rite
Lightning brings me down,
the sting still attached to the kite.

Final flight caught up in a purple haze,
dragons wings turn me upend.
Silhouetted gestures of similarity,
reveals a friend was not a friend.

The window opens and she appears,
brushing justice through her hair
The lone gunman hides in a dark corner
no one knew he was there.

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

Search For Tomorrow

We are not the keepers
of time and space
only dwellers in the confines
of a human race

Joined together we are,
yet still far apart
in lost battles of
Fractured hearts

Lurkers in the Midst
studying who we are
caring not of deep wounds
and battle scares

Our tragic souls whom
inside feel dead
Alone, Abandoned
Trapped inside their head

Search for tomorrow
from lost yesterdays
praying only for relief
somewhere along the way…

copyright (c) 2002 Paul Millard

Time

Time waits for no man
I know this to be true
for each fleeting moment
I think of my time with you

Time has no shame
cares not of hearts broken
nor tears shed o’er lost love
from words left unspoken

Time is not a toy, nor is it
part of a bigger game.
left here growing old alone
yet I still whisper your name

Time is winding down
is there no time left for me?
My eyes grow weary, tired
as I drift now off to sleep

(c) 2002 Paul Millard

Where There’s A Will

Where there’s a will, it will be done,
anything under the sun.
These aren’t words I merely say,
it happens every single day!
And I know that, well, you can do it too.
But right now your heart is full of pain,
you feel there’s nothing left to gain.
listen to me, you’ll will see it through,
if you believe in you.

Where there’s no will, it will be found,
need not be six feet under ground.
it’s simply a cowards way out,
I’d rather kick and scream and shout
close my eyes and dream,
it’s much easier than it seems.
living my life in fantasy,
brings you closer yet to me
cus in my fantasy, I keep my endless dream alive.

Where there’s a will, there is a way,
Tommorow’s a bright new shiney day.
Hurry, hurry don’t be late,
we’re sitting outside Heavens gate
If God is kind to us, then we should be kind to all ..

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

Heartbreak and Razor Blades

Heartbreak and Razor blades
see me through the long night.
You can’t begin to imagine
the hurt that comes to light.

No words can describe what
my existence feels like to me.
I pray to God, this I do,
will set my tortured soul free.

I had my dream,
I wished for it all !
I knew it’d not come true
no not for Paul.

Fate tasks my Fortitude,
being unloved is too much
every thought is a stinging reminder
of how I must be out of touch

Words have no meaning,
not like anyone cares
nor would they when they find
me lifeless in my chair.

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard

Green Peace

There is a Green silence in the misty ocean waters,
north of Inverness, 25 meters up a tower of destruction.
There’s no price to high to pay to save the lives of our
children, it haunts me as I read their instructions.

A school of Dolphins swim to a tortured fate,
so beautiful in the green ocean of regret
they paid no attention to the large ships,
or to their huge nets.

On a self destructive heading is mankind,
hiding behind armies of mongers and police
I prefer to lay my life down for our future,
and be active in the cause of Green Peace

Copyright ©2004 Paul Millard